Truth
–
A firm place
For stubbing toe and
A soft place
To lay head…
Bewitched paradoxed ground with
Reeds not bowed by wind.
–
–
Submitting this for: One Shot Wednesday at onestoppoetry.com
((I’m giving poetry a try. Been writing poetry for years, but only put up on the blog recently. The poem above is my attempt at writing a “Shadorma”, a poem of six lines, with the following syllabic structure: 3-5-3-3-7-5)).
((And I changed the last two lines of this poem after submitting it to One Shot Wednesday– and so this post has been updated a few times because of the revisions I made of the poem –sorry for that. I wanted to change the last two lines, wasn’t quite right to my ears, and I like the above ending better. In case you’re wondering, the last two lines were originally this: solid terra unmoved, not /reeds shaken by wind. The above poem is the last revision– I’m letting it be. Thanks for reading!))
I like this form called Shadorma…your words lend well to its structure.
thank you for reading & commenting!
Ah, such place make me want to hike and dream. Nice One Shot!
for stubbing your toe and resting your head…that is truth for sure…very nice verse
Very serene, peaceful write…naked trees and a fully clothed turf…a place to rest. Nicely done!
@ dustus, brian, tolbert: thanks much for your kind words and encouragement!
To stub the toes is to wake up!
@ cathykozak: … and reach for a band-aid. 🙂 Thanks for reading & commenting!
It is the truth. Nicely done.
thank you for reading and the kind words!
I liked your shadorma now I want go “stubbing my toe and resting my head”in the woods ~
ha ha! 🙂 thank you!
Love the paradox!
thanks for reading and the comment!