We paint the backdrop black– stark, plain and dark. It is what they want. My daughter and I, we are painting the backdrop for the set of an upcoming play. They want the black paint to cover up the previous colored canvas– cover it completely, so that no other color shines through.
That black paint follows me through the week. I have butter fingers– one day I drop a bowl, another day I drop a mug, shattering them to pieces.
But more than that, I carry black splotches on my heart when I don’t want to love, or forgive, or when I say or think something that I shouldn’t. These black spots hinder the light and cast a dark shadow over the days.
Thankfully the light uncovers the dark, wipes away the black, leaves the heart crystal clear. Thankfully, I can start over and these inky spots aren’t what define me. Thankfully there is a way out of the puzzle of the darkness.
Though I dropped a couple of dishes, I held many more up toward the sky, letting the God of the universe fill the cracked vessels to overflowing….
Time moves on and for a few days I tasted sweet fellowship of days gone by, as I spent time with loved ones. Minutes press forward, changing the flow and movement and state of life. I grieve for souls who are still searching for truth and meaning and joy– and what can I do about it? I often feel like I’m doing nothing, dumbstruck, saying the wrong things or nothing at all. I pray God takes my feeble attempts at living and transforms them into something I cannot even imagine.
In the quiet I am caught in the web of life, the past, present and future, relationships, and questions and circumstances weaving a place around me, and all the while looking upward for the answers and the focus.
***
930. The wonderful experience of being part of a play production with a Christian theater company.
931. Rays of light shining through gold, russet, crimson leaves.
932. Taking my youngest to an apple farm with a big group of others… petting and feeding goats, a corn maze, pumpkins, and topped with hot apple cider… a beautiful fall activity.
933. State-wide cross-country meet for the boys — fun, fun!
934. Homemade curried butternut squash soup– yummy.
935. Coupons!
***
Sharing with Laura for Playdates with God, Jen for Soli Deo Gloria, L.L. for On, In and Around Mondays, and with Ann for Multitudes on Mondays
What a great reminder that the darkness canNOT triumph over the light! And that we (I!) need to focus on those light moments, not the dark ones. As long as you keep looking up you’ll find the answers! It’s the best place to be, instead of relying on self like I tend to! Appreciated your words today. Thanks 🙂
Michelle
Hold on – don’t let it slip away, your faith is secure in his hands!
that’s the key for all of us, isn’t it? keep on looking upward!
how encouraging to know that we can keep looking up to the God of the universe, and our dark stains don’t define us…blessings 🙂
There’s so much light and darkness in each of our days… Holding up our brokenness to the Lord to let the light shine through–what a great example.
Hope the play turns out marvelous!
It’s a difficult balance sometimes, isn’t it? This is so bittersweet–I can feel that struggle. Holding the shards of the broken up to the light, my friend. Lovely, lovely post.